Why is My Baby Always Waking an Hour After Bedtime?: A Guide to False Starts

Just when you think you’re off duty for the evening.. Bam! Typically 30-45 minutes after you’ve finally gotten baby to sleep for bed… you hear them wake up again.

This is what is often referred to as a ‘false start’. I’ve also had families call it a ‘dry-run’, which is a good bit of comic relief in an otherwise pretty defeating scenario. 

It’s something that many parents have experienced. So, if this has happened to you and your baby before, know that this has happened to most families. It’s actually a super common struggle and something I’m asked about often. While they can happen for a number of reasons, there are four main ones that I am going to share with you today. When we know the root of the issue causing our baby to wake, it’s much easier to find a solution!

Here are some of the main causes for false starts:

#1. The number one and most frequent cause of false starts that I tend to see with families - is definitely being overtired at bedtime.

This is typically a combination of not enough sleep happening in the daytime (frequent short naps, or perhaps too long of windows between their naps). This is especially important to be mindful of during that final window between waking from last nap and the time they fall asleep at bedtime.

There is a sweet spot that exists for your baby to fall asleep for the night, but if your baby goes over their optimal final window before bed and dips into the overtired zone.. this can be a big trigger for false starts! It’s in part because of the cortisol increase and adrenaline rush that occurs in the body when we become overtired. That can be enough to POP some babies awake after just one sleep cycle in the evening. If this is happening in your home consistently - try a slightly shorter window before bed. Even starting with 15 minutes shorter of a final window can be helpful to many babies! Play around with that piece until you find the sweet spot for their bedtime. Watching your baby’s cues in the evening can be a massive help for landing in the sweet spot for bed. Cues such as rubbing their eyes or face, tugging at their ears, staring off with a glazed over look in their eyes, suddenly losing interest in playing, becoming quiet.. these are all common tired signs. Learn to tune into YOUR bay’s cues - and follow them! As soon as you see those cues in the evening, get going on that bedtime routine and have them cozy in bed, ready to drift off in good timing. Notice the patterns across several evenings with the timing, and you can use these numbers to help guide you with timing to put your baby down in subsequent evenings as well. For example, did your 8 month old do best with bedtime happening 3 hours 15 minutes after their second nap… or 3 hours? Your baby’s patterns are so important and they’ll guide you to that sweet spot to avoid those false starts. Be extra mindful of shortening that final wake window before bed on the days where baby has short naps, or less daytime sleep than usual. 

#2. The second cause for false starts is the opposite problem: Not ENOUGH sleep pressure!

This can result from either not enough wake time in that final window.. OR dozing off during bedtime routine just enough to take the edge off that sleep drive where we actually need it. This is of course typically a scheduling issue, which can be fixed for your little one! I have 3 resources in my resource library for you. There is one for a 3 nap schedule, a 2 nap schedule, and a one nap schedule. *(Link Resource Library Here)* Take a look and see how you could make adjustments to ensure your baby is getting adequate daytime sleep, but not so much that it’s negatively impacting bedtime and causing false starts for them. This will help them to better sleep through those precious evening hours where that deep, restorative evening sleep is most available to their little bodies. 

#3. They’re just too young for an early bedtime!

This one sound simple but it’s something that can actually be quite confusing for new parents - and I get why! The late bedtimes of newborns seems a little counterintuitive. But, did you know many newborns will naturally be ready for bed anytime between 8-11pm? It’s quite a range, and it’s completely normal if your newborn falls in the latter end of this window. If you’re putting your newborn to bed at 730 and you’re finding they always have a ‘false start’, try a touch later and see if that helps them. They may just be getting a little evening cat nap and aren’t quite ready for their first real stretch of evening sleep. Go with the flow here. They will likely wake and want a feed in this case. It’s very normal and natural for newborns to feed frequently, especially in the evenings. They are trying fill up their tummies for overnight - and those tiny little tummies need filling frequently! 

#4. They aren’t confident and comfortable with falling asleep in their sleep space just yet.

Often, we are able to transfer a sleeping newborn into their crib without them waking, but as they grow and become more aware (e.g., around or beyond the 4 months corrected age mark) - they may wake after one sleep cycle and think - where am I and how the heck did I get here?! Pretty understandable if you put yourself in their little shoes. If you think this may be what’s going on with your baby, you can try practicing crib sleep by supporting them to become more comfortable falling asleep in their sleep space! That way when they naturally wake after they first cycle in their crib.. they know just what to do… keep snoozin’! I know for many parents that have crib sleep in mind, the idea of this seems like a lofty goal. But, It’s entirely possible!

I have supported many families with their goal for independent crib sleep over the years, and whether you move gradually or more quickly, it’s absolutely something that can be achieved with support. I have a Baby Sleep Course for children 5 month - 24 months in the works right now that can guide you through this process step-by-step.